Friday, July 31, 2009

babying

I've come to realize that I have continued to treat Owen like a baby, far later than I did his older brothers. Possibly this is due to my increased busyness. Possibly it's a desire to keep the baby that (for a time) I expected to be my last from growing up too fast. Or I suppose it could be pure laziness....

When it's time to change a diaper, my routine is the same as it was 6 or 8 months ago: lay the child on his back on the changing table, and proceed. I don't name body parts as regularly as I did for the older boys. It didn't occur to me until a few months ago that I rarely encourage Owen to participate in the process of getting dressed - although I distinctly remember sitting on the floor with Benjamin, and Kyle too, showing him how to put his leg into his little sweatpants.

Also (and I am ashamed to admit this) I don't read to Owen as much. I never have. I love books, and I believe in reading to children - but somehow reading to my youngest child rarely works its way into our regularly schedule days. Continually I resolve to do better at this, but I have yet to follow through very consistently. I suppose the summer has brought a little improvement, but I obviously need to really focus on spending that time reading to my sweet boy.

With my first two children, I tirelessly named things: animals, colors, objects, body parts. But these days, I just forget, far too often. I suppose I'm a bit preoccupied lately. That's not a great excuse, but there it is. It's an explanation, anyway.

I adore this child. As an infant he was a balm to me, and aside from his immense tendency to spit up and his resistance to napping away from his bed, I no complaints about his babyhood - not one. We have a great bond, regardless of my neglect to verbalize the minutiae of the daily routine.

And I suppose I hope that the process of family life, and living with two big brothers, will fill in the gaps of what I've left unsaid and undone.

All the same, I'd better get on it and start teaching this boy to dress himself. Because in about 6 month I'm going to suddenly get a lot more busy!

What about you? How has your parenting changed (for better or for worse) as your family has grown?

8 comments:

Joy said...

Great picture!
I bet Ben would enjoy reading to him. My 6 yr old nephew reads to his sister (and Elisabeth when we visit).

Erin said...

I defintely baby my youngest more than my others.I also tend to forget about reading to her. Well, it isn't really that I forget, we just tend to stay on the move these days. I think she will nurse a lot longer than my older 2 kiddos as well.

Jennie said...

Poor little Matthew... he hasn't been read to nearly as much as the other two either. Is it because I can't fit 3 of them on my lap for bedtime? I wonder if the lack of consistent routine is why this baby has a very difficult time falling to sleep anywhere but my arms...

Shelli said...

Mindy... I could have written this post myself. I was lamenting just last week how I have forgotten to work on things with Jack that I did with Hailey... and especially reading books... we don't do it nearly as often with Jack... Hailey had books read to her in the womb! I laso have to tell you what a cutie Owen is... I laughed when I saw the picture because we have the same blocks... and Jack does the same thing!

Kristin said...

I have mommy guilt abou this, too, but there just isn't time to do it all like I used to. I try to involve the older children more. I get them to play with the youngers and help them dress, etc. And I do things we can all do together, like sing and read and play games. It will have to do!

Rena said...

There's definitely been a difference between my 1st and 2nd. For me, I think there's several factors--Tobiah's been so much needier than Katya was/is. And I think, too, having him after a loss has made me so much more aware of his preciousness. Plus, he's just so much more cuddly than Katya was that he inspires more babying!

Carolyn said...

I hear you....I feel the same way with Ryan. I just taught him a week or so ago where his nose was! Joshua and Michael knew that months sooner...what is it about boy #3? :-)

Ami said...

oh my goodness, Mindy!!! I haven't been online much recently as you know, so I'm just now reading this... my parenting has definitely changed between #1 and #2. But, who cares about all of that?!?! Congrats!!!! (Really, a great post - I'm just so excited for you.) :)