1) "Owen, please stop putting that chopstick up your nose."
2) "Because it's one of her bodily fluids, that's why. So no, you don't need to taste the bubbles she's blowing."
3) "No, you may not suck on her finger. If you want to kiss her hand, that's fine, but you may absolutely not suck on her finger."
4) "Okay, that's enough talking about blueberry poop. I am really, really sorry that I brought it up..."