Monday, February 11, 2013
a success story: self-perception
Here's a funny thing: I find myself feeling better about my body more and more.
I haven't made great strides toward my goals, and although I've been faithful in my routines (exercise, skin brushing), I haven't lost any dress sizes just yet. Don't worry, I'm not discouraged. I'm mostly feeling good about how I'm eating, though of course no one can eat perfectly all the time. At present things are holding pretty steady - my efforts as well as my waistline.
But here's the interesting part. It seems that the more tender care I take of my physical self, the more I am able to overlook the flaws I still see reflected in the mirror.
Take skin brushing, for example. Each morning I am taking a few minutes to tend to my skin. To go through a specific routine, to cater to my feet, legs, stomach, etc. As I work my way through...it almost feels like a love letter to my body. It's as if I'm saying: "You're worth it. I believe in you. I want to take care of you." Perhaps it seems far-fetched, but as I take the time to do this, and the other things I've made a priority, I'm growing an appreciation for my tangible form. For my shape.
I suppose maybe it's something like praying for one's enemy.
But my body is not my enemy - although it has seemed so at times in the past. It's a part of my human self. It has served me well; it continues to serve me well.
It's true that I am seeing some differences. The brushing is helping, and so is the regular exercising. I see toning where there was scarce before; I can feel that I am stronger. And when I make wise choices about the foods I put into my body, I feel better on many different levels. There is progress here - slow, steady, but not altogether intangible.
And so, I believe I've had some success. Not so much in hard, cold numbers - the scale, the measurements, the figures on the tags of my clothing - but in my attitude. In my heart. In my level of acceptance, appreciation, and ...yes, joy. I am learning to take joy in my shape again.
It's all so worth it. Maybe I will be a success story after all.